Many of you may not be interested at all, to see the world through my eyes. To be honest, most of the time, I'm not either.. But I'm sort of stuck with my own eyes, hehe.
Tonight I've been thinking about love. It seems like most people spend their lives trying to find this one person, their ideal match, the person they want to spend their lives with. The person they want to share everything with. Which is a beautiful idea. But combining two separate lives together.. It seems tricky. Almost impossible to do. And to still both be comfortable.
I'm not looking for love. Not anymore, anyway! I used to, though. I was looking for love, and I found it. But above all, I found hurt and betrayal. And I'm not trying to sound all depressed about it, because I do think this is what most people find. They may find love in the end, which I haven't, yet, but most people do find hurt and betrayal on their quest to love. Let's face it. Now I didn't stick to my own surroundings, or even my own country. I looked for love all over the world. No wonder I got hurt.
I once heard that everyone cheats. Sooner or later. Everyone does. It's unrealistic to look for a partner that does not. It's just something you can't expect from a human being, it seems. And some people may be fine with that. I suppose. But if this is the case.. does love even mean anything?
Maybe we aren't looking for love. Maybe we're looking for something, someone, to complete us. Maybe we should be looking for a way to complete ourselves. We all depend on other people. They can make our day and ruin our mood with one single remark. And when you think about it, that's pretty scary. Our happiness depends on other people..
Like everyone else, I am also looking to complete myself. I've taken some major steps in trying to achieve this goal. I've dated. I've had long term relationships. But except for one relationship, they never made me feel complete. When you're young, you have this idea set in your mind. You'll meet an awesome guy by the time you're 20-ish. You move in together by the time you're 25-ish. You have kids when you're 30-ish. I met an awesome guy when I was 20-ish. And now I'm 25-ish and moved in.. with two dogs. Odds are, I'm not gonna have any kids by the time I'm 30-ish. Luckily, I don't want any, but still! The funny thing is.. with these two dogs, I feel more complete than I ever felt in a relationship. They're always happy to see me. They never judge me. They don't care if I don't feel like taking a shower, in fact, they prefer the way I smell when I don't! They always appreciate my "cooking", they happily go wherever I want to go without complaining about not wanting to do certain stuff or see certain people. They accompany me in napping when I get tired, they enjoy watching movies with me and don't complain about the movie I picked. They even friendly greet the people in my life who don't like them.
This is by far the most fulfilling relationship I have ever been in!
